the best memory of my life
also consists of the worst one
visiting my grandparents in
Malaysia
it’s because they kicked
my mum out because
of disagreements
bad blood so they say
racism has existed in my own
bloody bloodline for decades
and i remember going off
to the hilled hotel
wasn’t so bad
no kung-fu yelling
no switchblade swearing
just chocolate chip cookies
and a green grass rock bay water view
with some watermelon juice too
the other desert day,
it made me realize
that photograph of us in the dining room
together fake smiling
me, mum, dad, paji, maji,
i can forgive
i can forgive
but never shall i forget
nor hide anymore the
bruises to my heart
from the utter gutter dividing
nonsense
they washing machined
into my upbringing
into my mum’s life
and my father’s
they never attended their wedding
spread rumors for years like growing tumors
they bribed to split
they wanted from the start
the three of us to quit
so i remember
everything
about how not be a grandparent
Jazz Marie Kaur (Vevna Forrow) is the host of the Hummingbird Blink: Nectar Poetry podcast on Spotify featuring poets from around the world. She is a visual designer, creator and editor of Dipity Literary Magazine, plus self-taught cartoonist. She is the author of the Jazzy Hummingbird Project, Galactic Birdbrain, Colibri Kingdom. and Moby Sick which debuts at the end of this year. Her spoken word artistry name is The Moon Kingseas on music streaming platforms. Work of hers appears in the Lothlorien Journal and Kindergarten Mag. Visit vevnaforrow.com.
